Vegemite, Marmite or Our Mate?

Aussies kids are brought up on Vegemite sandwiches. Rumour has it that no true Aussie leaves Godzone (as they are inclined to refer to their fair country) without a tub, tube or jar of the stuff in their suitcase. They extol its virtues with an evangelical zeal. It's very hard for them to understand that those of us who spent our formative years in Britain may prefer Marmite.

It's not that I don't like Vegemite it's just that Marmite is the taste I grew up with and after a hard day at the chalkface if some comfort food is called for then Marmite hits the spot. OK, a G&T hits the spot even better for most folk but you get the general idea.

The product available in Aus called Marmite is, in fact, Vegemite which is made in NZ. Proper UK Marmite isn't available except in a few specialist shops imported under licence and costing three times the price. For an addict though, it's worth it. A jar of Marmite lasts a helluva long time after all so what's it matter if you spend a bit extra? The alternative is to beg visitors to smuggle it in through customs for you but since they brought in the sniffer dogs you don't like to ask. Aussie quarantine officials are fierce and if they catch you trying to bring in even a meat paste sandwich you'll soon wish you'd taken the easy route and become a heroin mule into Bangkok. The days of contraband yeast extract are over.

So, gentle reader, imagine my disappointment when I called in at my local supplier and was told there was to be no more Marmite. Sanitarium, producers of NZ Marmite, had got an injunction against the import, sale and display of UK Marmite as it was thought to be damaging sales of their own (dare I say, vastly inferior?) product. Weetabix ditto. Buy Sanitarium's Weetbix instead.

Sensing I was about to dissolve into tears the shopkeeper said in a conspiratorial manner, "Don't worry, luv, it'll be OK. Come back on Thursday." Sure enough, when Thursday came around I rushed back to the shop and got my fix. Goodbye Marmite. Hello Our Mate.

It would probably be churlish of me to suggest a worldwide boycott of Sanitarium products as revenge for their mean-spirited actions so I won't. We must all do as our conscience dictates in this matter.